I'm playing musical beds - it's not very fun
3 of us had 22 margaritas. Hellllllo yellow cab. Goodbye morals.
my drunk uncle just explained that turkeys are not gentle lovers... and no context doesn't make it better.
Studying for the exam.. Identifying the portraits using phrases like "large penis"
thats what you get for writing a paper after liquor pitchers
its only a rough draft.
Its that time of week again, Bad life decision wednesday
Is there really anything more beautiful than opening a fresh box of wine on a Friday afternoon?
2048oz a keg...divide that by solo cup... comes out to 128 beers...simplifies into 5.3repeating cases...drinkable between two people
and u failed math?
I had to physically pry the rocks out of your hands so you wouldn't throw them at the guy with the cowboy hat. You probably would've missed anyways.
Can't wait to hear which one of you won the 'fuck a bigger geek' contest last night. Queen Amidala vs Lara Croft. See you at breakfast.
I've been on the toilet for an hour. On a six day bender. My ass feels like its leaking vodka
Today is a wonderful day to be mildly hungover
I woke up with Pop Rocks stuck to my ass
Me and my liver are not on speaking terms.
Congrats, you are the first person our bartender ever met that actually needed wheeled out of a bar in a wheelchair. He said you were his hero.
Randomize
