Dude I gave him a bj because he was upset about the NFL draft, if that doesn't lock it down, i don't know what does
dude she was givin me head and stops and looks up at me and tells me she loves me, then goes ''alright now cum in my mouth''.... pretty sure shes the one
So I drew a giant robot attacking a city on the chem test. My TA colored in the fire on the burning building
Congratulations!! You are the WINNER of a brand new BLOWJOB!! You can collect your prize between the hours of 12pm and 1pm today, anywhere you'd like!!! :)
We can't BOTH have terrible sex lives. Get fucked or throw him out.
I'm on the bus, watching a girl shush her balloons.
in honor of breaking bad starting soon, i am now banging a walter white lookalike. viva heisenberg!
you really need to remember next time not to write your name and phone number on the paper its wrapped in.
But what if it got lost?
its illegal. you dont want people to contact you if they find it.
AMERICA LOVES YOU. RIDE THAT DICK LIKE PAUL REVERE RODE HIS HORSE SO MANY YEARS AGO
How many times have we said we'd stop taking Jell-O shots with strangers?
Saw my drug dealer at Easter mass with his family so that was weird
I'm still hammered too. I started tweeting the time at one point I'm pretty sure.
I think my pickup truck has been used for the sex... This doesn't sit right with me.
I'm just happy stripping was the reason you fractured your hand
Lighting a fucking bong with a candle. Straight up dedication.
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