Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
The new Black Eyed Peas song is the stupidest shit I've heard since the last Black Eyed Peas song.
judging by the cake all over the hall, my neighbors had a pretty successful thursday too.
Turns out getting tied up to two door handles and forced to repeatedly cum is actually a really good ab workout.
I can't believe I cried over a sausage mcmuffin.
Swear to god this chicks brother got let out of jail for the weekend for the sole purpose of cock blocking me
If I die, I leave all my liquor in my apartment to you. Be a drunk bitch at my funeral. I wouldn't want it any other way.
I'm doing somethin that's never been done before...the 10 am booty call come over
I began mixing captain Morgan and jack daniels and called it captain jack sparrow. I puked. a lot.
soon, soon....
I don't believe you anymore. You're like the boy who cried coitus.....
Nautical themed porn is also great bc someone usually wears a captains hat
I'm gonna snort this pill I found on the ground cause that's how classy I am. Watch football and eat Beef jerky. Domesticated at its finest.
pretty sure I woke up to him jacking himself off IN MY BED
I sit across from him at graduation so I get to stare at him and think about how I fucked his step brother and laugh to myself
Dammit. the window insulation sheets are too small for my windows. Yet again I am disappointed by size
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