Yours is on the dinner table...mine is in my underwear drawer.
I just found 22 drunken videos and 4 naked pictures on my phone. We'll start the bidding at $5
since when did accompanying a guy to a wedding mean that anal was required that night?
It's not normal to lose a tooth eating a McDouble.
Well, McDonalds 'escorted' me out after I passed out mid-order
no, i'm currently making the trek across campus to get all my stuff from last night. My ID is in one guys bed, and my camera in another guy's bed.
By the end of the night i was making legitimate noises not just saying moo.
He told me he deactivated his facebook because his girlfriend caught him wackin it to my profile picture.
10 points to you
I resisted the urge to announce that it looks like a big crystal butt plug
I think I maybe realized he was too old for me when I went into his bathroom and he had anti aging face cream.
For the first time in my life, I may be the most normal person in the room.
Update: I am definitely the most normal person in this room. And the least tattooed.
You cried for a while then lifted lots of weights then cady's ex put glitter on your tits and then you took a nap. I got you pizza and brought you home. Nothing too exciting.
I told my boyfriend that the thing I missed most about him was scratching his balls for him.
You know you're an upperclassmen when you go to a party with no makeup, wet hair, weed socks, and no shoes, take a shot ski, then leave
Dude.. She just busted into my house wearing a ski mask, a poncho, and thigh-high pink hooker boots and yelled, "THE CABS ARE HEEERRREEE!!"
Randomize
