so then you were screaming "GIVE ME KELVINS!" and heating things up in the microwave and no one knew what you wanted
the only human I can compare her to is rosie o'donnell.
He upper decked the toilet, got himself lit on fire 6 times and lit 4 other people on fire in the course of 3 days.
I am particularly sorry about getting dome in your backseat. And for thinking you wouldn't notice.
I ended up staying at a police station for being a witness in a public masturbation case..NOW do you believe me that I've never had a good St. Patrick's Day?
I just want to do a slip-and-slide into a giant pool of jello shots right now.
He shoved his balls through an egg carton and showed us a picture. They were surprisingly egg-like.
Someone left their drag queen on my couch. On the plus side, he sure does know how to make a mean cup of coffee.
Cops on bikes. I think I can outrun them.
too late I already started a fight with someone named luscious
I like her. She smells like old lady but tastes like whiskey
You spent the entire night trying to get me to make out with you
yeah I remember. your boyfriend shouldnt have cheered me on though.
He kept telling me that it stood for Sex Utility Vehicle
I'm just gonna ride this ego train to sex town
He can be a kind, caring soul but also give in to the temptation of eating unicorn ass.
Randomize
