So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
All I seem to do lately is get myself off, take naked pictures and drink beer. I don't know if thats a good or bad thing.
This sounds like "Sober" Ericka. Sorry that message wasn't for you. I only do business with "Fell off the wagon" Ericka. Please pass that message along to her.
Well hey if hot cowboys are involved then all bets are off.
She just opened a six pack of corona with her car door ... I had no idea she was such a skilled drunk
In a shocking revelation, I learned that the Easter Sunday shit show happened not because of vodka but because my gay neighbor drugged me.
You don't have anything to lose--we've established that he's not going to murder you and he smells good.
Wait. You NEVER used a Dizzy Doodler pen as a vibrator?!?
She licked my face when I was on the phone with a customer and I just laughed. Im not sure if thats good or bad
The lady at the Humaine Society gave me her nephew's number because I seem like a loving and caring person.
Does she know that each time you've adopted a new cat in the past year it's because some guy stopped fucking you and you don't want to eat your feelings?
i just tried to use a string cheese as a light source
I would say I miss her friendship, then I remember that she gave 4 guys the clap. I'm good.
I'm by myself. some Midwest chick is hitting on me because I gave her a deviled egg. I need the distraction.
If you get me a sex toy for Christmas everyone in my family will question our relationship.
We made out in front of everyone INCLUDING his girlfriend. And no one saw. THAT DRUNK!
Randomize
