Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
Please stop sending me picture messages of your shit. Seriously. I don't care if it looks like popcorn chicken.
she said she was gay. i said prove it. she said "ok i wont fuck you"
Someone left a beer in front of your door...there's a note with it that says "peace offering"
You are forgiven. I sent you a picture of a pumpkin man as a gesture of reconciliation.
just so you know... i was wasted last night, but the evening is coming back to me in flashes... i made you eat gravy last night, didn't i?
Just read my long term horoscope. I'm not gonna get laid for another 2 years.
Beware of calls from Dad. I just had a longer than I would care to admit convo about the ididarod. Apparently it starts tomorrow.
Its raining shots and i keep catching them in my mouth like you with dicks shits crazy
So I just noticed that my last drunk google search before going to bed last night was "ghosts based on gays." I have no idea what that's supposed to mean
I have shit my pants twice this week. #adulthood
I kind of just assumed by how he whisked eggs that he would be bad in bed.
I've never been so turned off by an omelet.
I just chased my birth control with Smirnoff. Shit's about to go down.
easy for you to say. you're not the one who has to explain why you woke up with a pineapple and a used condom.
Randomize
