I wish I had my old roomstes number so I could send him pictures from lastnight... I had a blast banging his "true love" now that I think about it we're even don't worry about that gas bill you didn't pay. Ur girl worked it off!
No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
What are you wearing to our high school reunion?
I don't know, What kind of dress says "I feel sorry for you people?"
My history with restaurant waiters is severely limiting our dinner options.
this boner is exhausting
His texts read Like a 15 year olds diary.
dude i just made a burrito by wrapping 2 packs of scooby snacks with a fruit roll up. im so high
She told you broke her computer after the little square in tetris wouldn't rotate for you...
I drove to my yoga class while eating a piece of bacon. Wow. I see myself in a whole new light.
Dude she let me install handle bars on her headboard. I should have nailed my boss years ago.
So Bodhi just sent me a pic of someone's balls with a message that says "I hope you all have a ballin' night." I don't even know what level of friendship to call this anymore.
Oh my god.
The ballsiest level.
I've seen you dance and let's just say its a good thing you don't have a small dick
I got to walk around for eight hours wearing power armor and acting camp. No way I wouldn't love it.
Last night I had a sex dream about Trudeau, he hasn't even been prime minister for 24 hours
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