This guy has a retainer. We're golden.
Probably should plan this out. Step one: grow stache. Two: get trenchcoat. Three: Kidnap Selena Gomez.
I had better be fucking involved with step four.
Hold on. She's wrapped herself in toilet paper and is scaring the dog.
Too many margaritas?
i'm moving back early just in case the freshmen need a tour of the school
oh right the one that ends on your bed
What do you think it is?
It's a boy. I know it. She always manages to have a cock inside her somehow.
We both bought three foot bongs...going to race to see who can smoke a mile first.
Wheres my "thanks for using birth control effectively and not contributing to the downfall of society" card.
Doubtful. That seems irresponsible. The 4th will kill you if you stopped drinking until then. Let's think logically.
You can wear my underwear. It'll be like old times.
Oh no. Not her. Her personality clashes with mine in ways that would make me wanna beat myself with a stick.
I just got stoned alone and repierced my nose. don't ever tell me I'm unaccomplished
I just got stoned by myself and am eating cookies so I'm right there with you
I am googling "notable people who had syphilis"
the only thing she has in her apt so far is toilet paper and shot glasses. you can see where the priorities lie.
I feel so accomplished. I've cleaned my room, done laundry, called those places, gotten jobs, and masturbated.
I'm so proud of you.
I climbed on the arm of the futon, flapping my hand fan frantically and hissing imprecations at the smoke detector
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