...she just doesn't genetically have the things I want my kids to have.
thank god dogs can't talk. they see way to much.
I have no idea. I woke up naked on someones toilet locked in the bathroom with two baby kittens.
Now she's making me sit here and look at pictures of guys she likes who look like bears. She's calling them her bear friends.
I'm drinking and throwing an enormous tennis ball at children. I couldn't be happier.
I feel like calling off tonight. Is a strong desire for masturbation a valid reason?
Friends don't let friends drunk sleep in the dorm common room
You're just gonna have to make the sacrifice man.
I'm trying to hide in the table.
Nothing like waking up and watching Dr. Phil and masturbating. It's like a protein shake for the day.
My phone just put together a highlight reel of yesterday's dick pic session, set to music and everything
We have angered the beer gods. It feels like I'm shitting angry cats.
god i just can't wait for finals to end so i can just masturbate all day and night
I fucked a French man last night. 5 Times. Ashed my cig in his cactus. That later set on fire while we were having sex.
i found a picture from last night of you sat on the floor naked, covered in butter and crying. care to explain?
I was hoping you could tell me..
It's like a donut of clothes around a pair of heels. Like they were transported to another dimension naked.
Randomize
