The guy at McDonald's just told us there is no flash photography allowed.
It's going to be great. We're a perfect team to break up marriages and happiness.
oh and if she happens to say anything about a cantalope and tissues... just go with it
I literally have a bandage on my dick that's how bad she is at handjobs
somehow this turned into a costume party you have to get here now with my banana suit or I'm wearing my birthday suit
Hey my vagina is like a company. Everyone has an equal opportunity....
Seriously, I woke you up with tacos, I think I deserve the best girlfriend ever award
I'm not sure I can continue to condone our having sex in all of your friends' beds
Locals got pissed I was talking to the barmaid. Tried to tell me that they keep all the good beer at "a Soho walkup" Google saved me
I know but at least you've never been asked to have sex dressed up like Catwoman
I woke up with her finger in my vag. Let's just say that I'm one horny inquisitive drunk.
I need a hoe opinion
go on
Do it break your family into faction start a civil war
So I slept with some guy last night and when I woke up in the am couldnt remember his name. I text him n asked "How do you spell your name?" to try n find out and all he replied was "With an A." WTF!?
Don't come up here. Strippers r crying.
Randomize
