did you get engaged???
Ok walking to car, 3 gay guys park get out of car, one on phone says 'I dont know but I was definately getting some curb rubbing'
matt is drinking blue powerade and it looks like he has hypothermia. i can't take this kid anywhere.
lesson #67 learned in college: a three day old margarita, is still a margarita.
Just tipped at a bar in cheerios. Suck it.
the boobs are fake... i feel like i just found out santa isn't real.
So I just learned that my father was teaching me rules for drinking games when I was 5.
I just realized that two weekends in a row we ended up in a bathroom with two different boys asking us for a threesome. does this happen to everyone?
My dick is covered in produce stickers. I suspect you
My heart is having a hard time convincing my vagina he's not worth it.
So, we bought a knight today. Nearly life size. Hes in the garage, so don't be startled.
Just out of curiosity. Did you wait until my fb picture was well liked by others before liking it so people won't know we're fucking?
I feel like my sexual preferences are just another sign that I am a 75 year old drag queen in a 29 year old woman's body.
You put THAT much Jager in me and expect me to realize when things are a bad idea?
I don't want to sleep with any other woman but you but I want to try this whole mother daughter thing that would be nuts
Randomize