fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
I feel like a bad episode of csi trying to figure everyone's DNA that's in me
So, I picked up my 7 ft tall lamp post and used it to close my door. I feel quite accomplished.
I'm not judging you... I'm judging our friendship
She's trying to figure out what kind of dinosaur I am... Yay codeine.
The cops knocked on our door just to ask us if we were really having a no-pants party.
I took a hang over nap infront of the door to my 9am class
Just ran into her dad at the strip club. He bought me a dance. I think i found a winner.
AT THIS RATE YOU WILL HAVE FUCKED MORE OF MY CLOSE FRIENDS THAN I HAVE PEOPLE PERIOD BY VALENTINE'S DAY.
Would giving a bouquet of flowers to my mother be a good way to say, "sorry you walked in on my boyfriend eating me out"?
I look like I just got gang banged and I'm wearing a Taylor swift t shirt. It's not gonna be a pretty breakfast.
So I was putting on a condom and looked to my right to not make eye contact, she said did you just look at the American flag while putting that on. I said this one's for Team USA.
Jk probs not coming. Tequila
Well, she chose the fuckboy life or the life chose her. Not sure which one but either way I don't need that negativity in my life.
Yeah. 11 people shoved in a clown car for a 1 hour party. I'm too old for house parties.
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