Got home from the bar at 4am. 100% sober, unlaid. Epic fail or responsible behavior?
Responsible fail?
i convinced her that her period would come back if we did it doggy style
when i was alone, his dick was there for me...
I made weed fried chicken. What have you done today?
Everytime I walk into a bathroom at school that I've taken a pregnancy test in I get a little bit nostalgic....
just a question.. totally understand if you dont know what im talking about.. but.. do you have my funnel? i think i tucked it in to your bed last night.
I know it's not standard practice to meet the couple you donate to, but i'm curious as to what kind of people saw my picture and said, we want that girl's eggs
Sorry if I put you in that 'glad we're hanging out but I'm gonna go fuck your cousin' kind of position
I think I kinda scared him when I told him if he premature ejaculated I would punch him in the throat.
I CAN FEEL MY HEART BEATING MY WHOLE BODY
She's lucky her pussy is worth listening to her ramble about bedroom furniture for 30 minutes
I just ate your leftovers whilst watching Garfield and Friends. Thank you across the board.
I just used Bacardi to dry out poison ivy.
I asked him to have birthday sex with me via xbox live
Want ramen today?
I need a salad
SALAD DOESNT WARM YOUR HEART AND BELLY
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