I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
Three words: puerto rican gang bang
is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
I just cleaned my sheets and decided to do a black light test. My headboard is a masterpiece.
You were throwing ham at people telling them you were the sandwhich fairy
I have a plus one for the Blackout Express, should I pen in your name?
Since i didn't have a condom I told him to use jump ship method, I think I was overly invested in my sailor costume this year.
Can one of you do me a favor? Light a match and throw it into my room. Bc I'm certain I would rather be burned to death than live in this hell I call my life
Some guy I've never met before just came outside and started rolling a blunt on our fence and passed it around to all six of us. At eight in the morning. Today's gonna be weird.
Adding to the list of things I have said out loud at the bar that I shouldn't have: "I am the yoda of sucking dick"
He lit a candle for the mood and ended up lighting my hair on fire while we were hooking up...moodkiller
Do me a favor and don't mention him I feel like Regina George and I just want to scream I made him
It's only 9 and these two girls are already walking around Walmart barefoot and holding their heels. WE NEED TO STEP IT UP.
Okay first of all fuck you and everything you stand for because Taco Bell is amazing.
Woke up in a house I don't know, with someone else's pants on, and wolverine hair, to my girlfriend yelling on the phone about the 4 girls I made out with last
Randomize