i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
i'm watching the fashion show on bravo
you're cheating on project runway?
if you can't score coke, you buy crack.
I just saw Sharon Stone's cootch in high def. I think I'll stay gay.
bouncer thought i was tryin to get the license plate numbers of strippers to stalk them. I had to go show him where I threw up to get back in.
her face looked like how i feel after Taco Bell
I justified spending $400 stocking my bar to my sister by saying it was an investment
Personally I think it's a tremendous investment
They were going around the house breaking things and screaming "Not my house!"
It involved anal and pop rocks. Tell me how that could have ended well.
I feel like everything I touch in this bar I'm gonna get hepatitis. my kinda joint
It feels like I'm breathing out my heart and it spreads through my limbs to my fingertips.
I'm in Starbucks carrying the boxes wine and the hubcap. So many judging looks.
I'm currently deliberating if I'm going to be too drunk on New Years to handle wearing false eyelashes.
Remind me to tell you all about the topless girl on the street who attempted to taze me.
I looked into her soul, didn't I?
You eye-fucked her soul.
Randomize
