): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
Thank God they found balloon boy, I was afraid that Michael Jackson was ordering take out from heaven.
Her friend drew me a diagram of how we could get away with her giving me a blowjob at work.
this is the last time we take the mathletes drinking.
As per my father's affair, married men are no longer off limits.
going to class with no bra.. is that saying "i don't give a fuck i'm one hour away from thanksgiving break?"
Just read my long term horoscope. I'm not gonna get laid for another 2 years.
Just an FYI: The offer for you to come snow blow my driveway in return for sexual favors is still on the table
Guess who won bingo at the senior center and is going to jail all in the same night?
I feel the need to clarify that I did not show her my vagina.
putting weed in the twinkies box was possibly the best idea you've ever had
Sorry for locking you out after accusing you of eating my Skittles... I realized I was mistaken after just throwing up the rainbow.
How external is "for external use only"?
with great strapon comes great responsibility.
Just seriously saw this chick say, watch this motherfuckers then did a 42 sec keg stand.
You at least asked for her number right?
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