I want to buy you liquor! I want to kiss your face.
her parents were awake and in the next room. i think i deserve a big fucking medal for that orgasm.
I swear to god he's a one man village people.
2nd night home for break and we had to call the fire department to keep the house from burning down. At this rate I'll be lucky to see you next semester.
during a bj, his alarm went off and he said "At the buzzer"
We stayed up until 4:20 AM. The next thing I remember was waking up at 4 PM, like my internal alarm clock knew.
Hey, met you at the bar last night. You probably dont remember my name. You and your friends came back to my place, you shattered my window with your fist then dipped. Your gonna need to pay for that.
Thats where this cut came from! Thanks for piecing together the puzzle dude.
If I have to strap one on and give it to you good, you will not die revirginated. That's friendship.
His name sounds so important....sounds like the name of my future baby daddy to me.
Then my perve supervisor asked about your vagina. And I was like nunya, but its glorious
I'm willing to share. He can have sloppy seconds.
yea plus he's gonna be wearing his gumby costume so that'll take a lot of pressure off too
i took a magical journey through the park for about two hours. it was amazing and everything was fantastical. i have been informed someone babysat me through that shit.
Does he know you were at a strip club taking shots of tequila right before you babysat his son?
Bro, that'd be the third dick I've taken down in the office.
Randomize