ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
hey dude i know youre in the next room but me and your sister need a condom, got any i could borrow?
Last night Brynn convinced every person at the party wearing glasses that they stole hers, and she woke up with 8 pairs of prescription glasses in her bag.
So, during a 20 minute shower I spent 19 minutes spinning in circles and 1 minute licking the wall, and it was better than sex. I can't wait to do X again.
I walked in and she was doing shots, betting the managers if any of the customers would notice, and screaming that nothing would ruin her Saturday night. Say what you want, I like working with my sister.
Something smells like weed and I think it might be my mascara. Come sniff my eyes
We had sex in the tent after his 6th beer and while we were at it we had conversations with the people outside the tent.
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
Dude are you alive? We drank shit that made a german bartender blow chunks.
Why am I the only one golf clapping for the vomiting girl on the train who just fell of her seat into her own vomit
Happy birthday, you long dick monster
Does puke ruin car paint? Good thing it's raining.
I was actually kind of excited. I mean, how many people can say they've been question by the CIA?
Did I fall last night?
I wouldn't call it falling as much as you tried to lay on the sidewalk and proceeded to hit it face first.
I am playing in the snow in my bunny outfit. GET OVER HERE
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