I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
so i decided to listen to you and went ahead and slept with him. you owe me 3 minutes
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
Why did you put hummus in my pillow case?
I woke up on a futon in some strangers house. They were eating pizza and told me everything was going to be fine.
I took shrooms last night.. For a good half hour I genuinely believed I was black and being held captive by a leaf. Never again.
Got back to find Sarah in her underwear eating peanut butter and watching Arrested Development with the thermostat at eighty.
Evvvvvveryone knows we hooked up in the DJ booth. People call it the BJ booth now. I've created a legacy
My lunch = taste testing salsas for A&P. They gave me a free 64oz grape juice as a thank you. So, now we have something to drink in the house. So while you are spending all the money on breakfast rolls and pizza for lunch, I'm cigaretteless and whoring myself for tablespoons of salsa and free juice.
Just realized I've gone to court three different times with papers and a joint roller in my briefcase. #lawyeroftheyear
and then you called me a third time and yelled that you were stealing a puppy named Willow
Figured out how to triple bathroom speed at #lollapalooza.. Girl squats, guy 1 goes between her, guy 2 uses urinal. Your welcome.
My feelings for him are donzo molonzo but I can't turn down a pierced penis...
logically I know i should probably study somewhere outside my dorm room, but if I do that then I cant drink and smoke half as much while i study
You know it's a pretty bad night when an injured penis is not the worst thing that happened to you. Fuck tequila
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