You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
hey remember that time we got really drunk, you tried to find narnia in my refrigerator and passed out in the freezer drawer??
no.
She keeps sending, "show me your elephant trunk."
She kicked in my bedroom door in only high-heals with a bottle of wine, announcing it was "cock-o-clock"
Vodka drinking games. Where you wake up next to a douche lord and see your thong in the blinds.
He said "I can't wait for you to feel me inside of you so I can tell you gently that you're mine" and left me a 4 minute voice mail of him crying after I told him I didn't want to be with him. 30 year olds are off limits.
You kept trying to get the girl i brought home to hook up with you by enticing her with 12 baconnators you brought home
I would go a lot of places to get laid. But I would NOT go to Staten Island.
So you let the Viking explore your nether regions?
My tits became the mascot for the SAE house last night.
Is it just me or is Michael Jackson blasting throughout the house
he's a mother fucking interior design major!! we boned and fell asleep and now we're laying in bed discussing what color i should paint my room. i'm marrying him
You were laying on the floor coloring a "get well soon' card for your liver...
I know you would. And one day, we'll have a moment where i'll verbally assault a stranger for you.
Do you just want me to shit in a Jack-o-latern
Randomize
