have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
sexting loses it's worth when you accidentally text your boss.
i wish there was an iPhone app that lets you write a TeXt LiKe tHiS
dude...come out of the closet already
He woke up, mumbled "silverware", and went back to sleep
Nope, I'm sticking to passive aggressive punishments. Like mismatching his socks and cumming on his leather couch. OCD is so wonderful.
Stop whining I left you with whiskey
YOU LEFT ME WITH WHISKEY ALONE IN A CABIN IN THE MIDDLE OF NOWHERE I AM GOING TO DIE.
Oh aight, and i was just going to be content with drinking, beating off and watching ninja turtles
He just got here and all he's wearing is a cloth over his penis.
I'll uninvite my mom
My boobs are feeling quite sensitive so I told them, " you is smart, you is kind, you is important" that should do the trick.
Hmmm. I never knew the difference. I've done either one and had stronger or weaker versions but usually if i took enough, i tripped balls. That should be a PSA for kids... if you take drugs and the drugs are weak, just take more drugs... The More You Know
He sent me a picture of him trying to push his cock into a Gatorade bottle. I dont know if I'm impressed it didn't fit and disgusted that he sent me something so vile.
I told you that you should stop drinking and you responded "Thanks for telling me how to live, North Korea!"
He once bought a dildo and put fifty dollars and a happy anniversary note in the battery compartment I gotta lock him down while hes available
I just dropped a chicken nugget on the floor and seriously prayed that it would be ok....I think this job is making me crazy.
I've seen your dick too many times for both of us to be straight.
Randomize
