i just fell asleep at my computer and i woke up and in the google bar it said delicious foods to eat
Or I die of a heart attack, which is the more likely/less fun scenario.
Our halfway to Halloween party needs to never happen again. There were waaayy too many wasted cartoon characters passed out in my living room this morning...
After he finished his girlfriend called him. I sat there, tied his shoes for him, then he high fived me and said "this is gonna be a great summer steph"
The only funny part about this situation was this morning when they rounded up all the drunks in the ER, piled us into a minivan, then dropped us all off at our houses.
I don't believe u have enough text space to describe the dimensions of his penis.
You shouted "FUCK SHANIA TWAIN" and then downed an Aquafina bottle of white wine none of us knew how to react
this night may include but is not limited to : police encounters, wild animals, stomach pumping, and waking up in a field
My backyard is filled with beer cans. You idiots turned our backyard into a redneck ball-pit
I got a snap of someone jumping off a light pole. Was that you? Please confirm or deny. #onWisconsin
I feel like with a dick like that he could of done more with it
i was making a gravity bong in my room and my dad walked in. he helped me finish. i love being home for the holidays.
you're telling me you don't want to have sex 30,000 feet above the earth?
That portable toilet under the bed? Turns out it was a tuba. Explains alot.
"I'm 22, I could die in a piano bar." -a sentence i actually just said to my boss
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