Kelly went into her room with Dave, but is moaning Tommy...
i wish that i had sketchier friends so that it would be easier to get drugs
you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
can we please take bets on how much therapy you'll need in the future?
we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
I just sat through a State Farm mortgage Insurance commercial to watch a Trick Daddy video. Is this the target audience they are going for here?
Did the math... it's Magna Cum Laude whether I get a 4.0 or a 0.0 this semester. I'm blacking out now, wake me up when I have to walk across the stage,
What's the policy for hitting on a girl at a funeral? She seems more bored than sad.
My clit is not a Gobstopper. Cut it out.
I'm pretty sure my liver died in Reno and my intestines are doing hula hoops around my asshole. The bachelor party was that good.
Our group of friends now have more broken bones than reasonable excuses for why they're broken.
I am too high to deal with coming home to 11 naked people in my living room
This power is too much for most humans to handle safely. It's like having the nuclear launch codes, except it's my penis.
and it's like......my shirt is off and he's talking about quidditch. why.
You told me not to tell you found out you're pregnant..
Randomize
