She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
I accidentally had sex with my boyfriend's twin last night...and he didn't stop me.
How was it?
Fantastic, but that's not the point.
I'm having a terrible night. Can I sleep over?
Too tired to pretend that I care : (
she was seriously choking and the whole time all he kept saying was "that's what she said"
i just discovered a movie that charlize theron is a sex addict. i think my prayers have been answered
Our new goal for this summer is to fuck so hard we lose his security deposit.
My face is tingly. And my legs are being massaged by golden elves.
Is percocet and coffee considered a balanced breakfast?
Sorry for locking you out after accusing you of eating my Skittles... I realized I was mistaken after just throwing up the rainbow.
No one will ever find true happiness until they have gotten stoned and taken off the bra they've been wearing all day.
You, my dear friend, are a poet of the deep mental longings of women worldwide.
If he thinks I'm canceling my orgy to coddle his stupid fucking behavior, he has another thing coming
My theme for the night was drink diego drink! Unfortunately Dora was not there to navigate me to the bathroom
My "birthday sex" consisted of approximately 25 seconds of him going down on me in the shower.
No, he came home, unscrewed all of the lightbulbs, and threw them in the sink.
He was gone when I woke up. But he left skid marks on my sheets and our unopened bottle of Titos is missing
New Rule: No more sleepovers with guys we met on Reddit
Randomize
