school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
no guy is ever going to take you seriously as a potential marriage prospect unless you learn to swallow
Your remote is drenched in lotion and you expect me to believe you weren't masturbating?!
Bad news. I lost my teeth. Good news. I can still take a guy home sans teeth.
josh has a chalupa in his pocket if you're hungry.
by the way- Brandy out of a doggy bowl was AMAZING
I want to pinterest what I want to do with my pubes. Why isn't there a board for that?!
Didn't know hookah bars could end badly. I feel for her hair
Ok there's 63 pics of you jerking it on my camera from New Years. The time stamps say it took you 40 min to get there too. See a doc, your only 22.
It has been so long since I got any action that I have decided to change my vagina's name from "the chamber of judgement" to "the cave of forgotten dreams".
I can't figure out how to eat twizzlers and I have to be at a wedding reception in an hour.
Please never have kids.
Last night must have been awesome because I went to get in the shower only to find the bat symbol drawn on my chest
That happened during battle shots lol
I'm wine drunk & this is not good news for anybody
I'm in the liquor store and fucking "Wannabe" by the Spice Girls is playing. IM ALREADY ASHAMED OF MY REASON FOR BEING HERE, GIVE ME A BREAK.
I am eating a fluff-a-nutter sandwich at the gym right now. I brought vodka too.
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