I can only name 15 people I've had sex with - can I just start claiming that as my sex number?
No. I was horrified and confused as to why you thought scrambled eggs and cottage cheese was a good mix
I just experienced a full blown christian wedding. I am SO GLAD YOUR WEDDING WASNT THIS.
I don't know. I woke up in the back of a cab in a drive thru line at whataburger with police lights flashing and my friend yelling" you didn't have to sell us out phil!" to the cab driver.
I have been drinking at the bar so long today that I literally just found a spiderweb from my leg to the bar.
in the past 3 nights i've fucked a millionaire, a drug dealer and a civil engineer... i dont really have a "type" anymore
no i decided against it. savin my coke binge for finals week.
I knew the night had taken a turn when we showed up and our flabongo was being chilled in the freezer.
I just had a brazillian performed by a hungarian named olga. Im pretty sure she was trying to rip out my soul. You owe me a million orgasms
well that explains the french fry and ketchup packet rolled into the wasitband of my sweats. thank you drunk me.
Ya I guess if we compared our actions now with our actions 2 years ago. We are definitely in a constant state of shit showness.
what the hell is that chicken wire thing she's holding?
An artistic expression of her stupidity.
I mean, he's 40, foreign, artsy but with substance abuse problems and estranged children. How is he not my type?
I just moonwalked my socks off. THAT LAZY. THAT HIGH.
its not much but to go through all that to ask for half a balls worth of money was so stressful
Randomize
