no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
My bad bro. I had no idea that when i suggested our triva team name be my last abortion tickled, that she would bring up cancun. Stay strong i think she really liked you
Only a mothe r could love this liver
i was high and broke so i stole a roast chicken and a 40 inch sheet cake from wegmans and ate in a bathroom stall.
I unwillingly was the ball between four hungry hippos last night. I thought the one chick was actually going to eat me
i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
For a day that started with shitting my pants, things turned out fairly well.
it was like getting a handjob from robocop
Eating a muffin with a knife and fork. Hangovers have hit a new low.
Tomorrow is Have Sex and Climb A Mountain Day. We have amazing dates.
Where'd you go last night?
Don't EVER let me photobomb a group of lesbians again. They made me their "straight mascot" and I ended up singing Donna summer tunes for beers at their apartment complex.
I needed to bring way more fireball to class to match this professors intensity
A 'Bear Fight' is a car bomb followed by a Jaeger bomb. Fuckface and I do those on slow days. Tonight, we did a 'Polar Bear on Fire'. Fireball, a bear fight in the middle, and end with rumple minze.
I made friends at the beach bars tonight. Several were worried for my well being.
Do you ever just feel the storm building inside of you that tells you you're ready for a giant indiscriminate fuckfest?
I am eating a fluff-a-nutter sandwich at the gym right now. I brought vodka too.
Randomize
