i'll give you all the meat in my fridge in exchange for 2 condoms.
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
i think its awesome that according to your mom i'm your friend that caught on fire.
Repeat the weekend mantra. "I like boys with teeth, I need boys with teeth, I deserve boys with teeth, I will have boys with teeth".
I'm drunk and you're awesome. let's stay this way forever.
There's a lady here with a big bag of dildos. I'm not sure that's appropriate bar baggage but, I like her style
She was into my hawaiian shirt and id never made out with a dinosaur... I feel like it worked out for everyone
It is very possible that having sex with you just now just got me into Yale
So we stayed at his mom's and all got drunk and he and I hooked up in his old bedroom. Then his drunk mom came in and tackled us when we were still naked. Why does this keep happening to me?
MY TITS ARE PERFECTLY CALM.
Oh, and let me go get some popcorn, watching you make your own decisions should be quite the shitshow.
He usually doesnt care about me cumming but last night he really tried, I feel that him going to the Womens March benefitted my sex life
At least you didn't lose your virginity to chumbawumba
I just don't think it's that outlandish to ask that I don't get messages from my husband at 8:30pm on a Wednesday telling me he peed on our cat
i need something from you. video yourself doing naked jumping jacks and send it to me. it will make me smile
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