We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
Could someone please kill snooki before she contributes to the gene pool.
answer the phone. i thought i was eating cheese but it was butter. i ate a lot of it.
I love how our sober spotter means you only have to stay sober enough to type your pin in an ATM
So what do you think the policy is on vomit in rental cars? do I have to clean that up or is that part of the service I'm paying for?
He made me a "booty call of the year" award.
Apparently I have a urinal in my bedroom
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
Lets go see if some hobos will give us a prostate massage for a 40 ounce.
Day 1 of "Death of a Liver" weekend complete. It came with flashbacks of horrible mistakes I made due to alcohol. I'm excited for how Sunday is going to turn out.
Also one of my neighbors is blasting "pumped up kicks" and possibly butchering some chickens
Nobody knows who they are, but they have an ice luge so they are welcome in my book
I have just been informed that my company has ray guns. I WORK FOR ACTUAL BOND VILLAINS. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
Heat not working dressed like an eskimo. A real one with a ski sock on my junk
I’m traumatised. Bring vodka and condoms.
Randomize
