last week i woke up at this guys house...this week i woke up at his ex girlfriends
Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
If a cop asks you "Where do you go for fun?", it's not a pick up line...especially if he just pulled you over.
I couldn't accept the bj. My penis has done nothing wrong and didn't deserve the punishment of her face.
It'd be like medium rare by now.
I love how we're talking about your vagina like it's a piece of meat.
there were like 150 questions AFTER the application. you'd think for a store that has dick molding kits it'd be a joke
hey remember that 14 year old i met 5 years ago who i said i would bang 5 years from then?
Yup.
she's lying on the floor with a bottle of vodka, belting shakira. plz advise.
He said he has something to give me... I swear to God if it's a joint or a framed picture of his penis i'm going to kill him
I found her sleepin on the side of the house in the rocks. so i woke her up and yelled at her and she would only come inside if i let her sleep in the bathroom.
Drinking and pointing where stuff needs to go is hard stuff.
There is a video of you making out with him, flipping off the camera, and holding the plastic flamigo that you had just stolen out of a yard
What's the world record for number of orgasms reached on ones birthday? Asking for a friend.
I want you
Nvm, now I want someone who replies to my booty-call texts faster
I need advice on ways to politely say “fuck you on your way to hell”.
Randomize
