OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
Do vagina's smell?
So i've def seen the girl running for student body VP getting fingered in a bar.
guy just got out of the car at the drive in and told his girlfriend "fuck you and your taco" and walked off
She's drinking vodka out of a windex bottle. She is spraying it in her mouth and at strangers.
Like not in a "I wanna have sex with you way" more like a "I wanna cuddle your mustache way"
So I'm at that stage in my life where I am stalking my stalker just to get laid
I don't know man, I have to ask my girlfriend if I can borrow my balls from her purse.
Well, when you bump into your parents at a swingers meetup, it's time to change cities
Also I found and fixed my beer gun.
someone wrote my own number down on my hand and then call me.
My lease is up and I've been thinking, it's only fair that the guys I've fucked in this apartment in the past year help me move. They enjoyed the bed, now help me move it.
I ate too many pot brownies and passed out topless with my boobs painted like the American flag
I'm just happy stripping was the reason you fractured your hand
My vagina likes him more than I do, but I’m going to follow her lead and see what happens
Randomize
