I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
What ever happened to making out with a few boob grabs here and there?
we didnt fuck last night. again. seriously, his place is like where dreams go to die.
nothing like Chinese food and masturbating on a Saturday night
Seriously. He was just sitting there naked in the dark with a boner pissed that I came home late.
Or they can chase TEQUILA shots with it. I don't know why my phone capitalizes TEQUILA.
How soon is too soon to enter the slutty phase of this breakup?
We are without power. He took ALL the lightbulbs out and hid them.
By the taste of his semen he isnt vegetarian and therefore lied to me to take me home on a brighter note i stole his fondue set
Attempted to dodge my boyfriends cum last night and ended up falling off the bed and getting the worlds most painful charlie horse. fuck my life.
Today is all about not throwing up, where the fuck are my keys and does anyone know what happened to that guy in the panda suit my roommate had sex with last night.
At this point I think you're just judging my taste in men
The last thing I remember from that party was me shouting "hold my feet I'm going in strapped like Rambo"
There is not enough whiskey in the world to get me through what happened on Pretty Little Liars tonight.
First world problems.
Girl, we were harassing people from the top of a building. I don't know how I got down, but I'm eating chocolate cake in my kitchen. Sall good yo.
Randomize
