I woke up with my face in a pile of pancakes and 3000 mistakes.
Dont you think its a little early in the relationship for sexting?
I only broke up with her because the ex sex is amazing. She will do ANYTHING if i even hint at getting back together
Tostitos Scoops as shot glasses. Eat for chaser.
As long as you're not dating white guys again.
So some sort of safe sex group just flash mobbed the bar by putting condoms over people's beers.
They left screaming as a hale of lubbed up condoms rained into their hair.
He got thrown out for leaning over the bar topless and pouring himself some beer while singing the james bond song
Now I'm at the gym and I never want to leave. It's a combo of adderall and endorphins and I don't want it to go away
At least now when I say "never again" the likelihood is that it won't actually happen again the next weekend...that my friend is called growth
drunk caitlyn doesn't know how to work gmail. so know an email has been sent to the entire campus with a picture of me naked eating a bagel attached.
We did it to 80's cardio music. Talk about a workout.
I would go disguised as someone he didn't have premature ejaculative sex with but I don't know if I could stay in character.
I'm just hoping that with all the times he's puked in my yard a mushroom field might grow.
Literally been in their house 5 minutes and I've projectile vomited all over the bathroom wall. The dog licked it up though so I think it's cool.
he told me he wanted me to go see his cat. apparently i was more interested in playing with his cat then having sex.
Randomize