I love how girls just decide that guys who don't like them must be gay
I do the same thing. If a girl doesn't like me...I am like, "i must be gay"
His shirt was in the kitchen sink this morning, I'm pretty sure my roommates know.
I would invite you but we are high and there is an AK-47. Not your scene.
She's trying to master eating with her feet. She said it was be she "always has to be prepared."
we were canoeing in the lake and i asked if he was too drunk for this, and he said "don't worry about it, i'm half native american"
Its not that I don't mind giving her as much as my penis as she wants, its the post sex cigarette I have to supply. Shits $9 a pack.
Put a tip jar next to your bed from now on.
Your good ideas are reason #4 we need to live together.
It felt as i were a pad of butter melting onto a piece of toast.
Smoked before work and just remembered i left pringles in my desk last time i was high. SCORE
Besides the one of you shaking your cock for 10sec that was one of the best snapchat's ever haha
He was talking up his golf swing like other guys talk up their dick. Is this adult dating or just another flavour of douchery?
There's a kid in the back of the class drinking out of a flask. Like what is going on?
NOW HE'S DRINKING OUT OF A HANDLE. WHO IS THIS KID?
We probably are going to die. So. Thanks for agreeing to be my Maid of Honor even though I torture you.
I woke up to a bum peeing outside my window, and he said, "This is embarrassing for you."
I just saw a girl on the phone crying and eating a sandwich. Thats talent right there.
This date is awful. He’s too boring to bang
Is porn accurate? Can I order a pizza and do the delivery boy?
Randomize
