shaved balls and baby powder=awesome
And I know a few people wouldnt want to even be around high people. Which is sad. But jet packs are cool.
Holy shit. This 2 year old just told me her nipples were for her boyfriend. Hello future leaders of america
The gay viking and his eqyptian 'queen' hooked up on our couches. They pushed them together to make a bed. Innovative, but awkward to come home from work to at 7 am.
i gave up on the vacation being fun the night i ate all the marshamallows out of the lucky charms while everyone else was having sex in the condo
I held the blackjack dealer's hand and told the old asian woman she was 'soft to the touch, but cold as ice"
Well, she yelled at the stripper that she couldn't lick whipped cream off his nipples because she is lactose intolerant.
He walked in on me banging his sister and said "you're both old enough to make you own decisions. Carry on"
Its a shame I cant put 'bomb ass head game' on my resume.
Did we actually play with swords last night or did I dream that?
I get dinner and bf perks from the one guy. But dick with no commitment from the other. I’m living my best life.
Seriously. There were about 4 hours in which I swear my nose was not attached to my face.
i think i left you like a 5 minute message about the mcchicken burger i was eating. I think I called wanting sex but the mcchicken burger was a lot more seducing.
Could’ve gone my whole life not seeing a man snort coke off another man’s cock... but there it is...
We all love a big dick, but you’re going to develop a reputation if you keep asking every guy at the bar ‘how big your dick’
That’s all I’m saying
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