why was he too nerdy?
he was a tetris block for halloween
When I realized it was a dog, and I still had a boner, it was awkward.
I just had a formal request to dress as a boyscout for my meeting with Legal on Friday. From Legal. Time to go home.
We broke two of his toes while having sex. He laughed said he'd fix it in the morning and kept going. I think I'm in love
U should just post that picture of u two on facebook with the caption, does anyone know this girl? If so please tell her to take plan b, thanks
I dove into a random van at the bar as the door was closing and ended up at some house with people I've never met in my life dancing in a basement
Dude you're alone at a bar with a woman, and you're talking about my junk?
Like hey, "you just spent $135k to go to a nobody law school to drive a mini van, be a dj, live in a smalllll ass apartment that smells like cats and your girlfriend fucks other guys."
All I remember is folk music and a lot of drugs. I am never going "on an adventure" with you again
I'm going to assume that "the army of generous folk dancers" is no longer a goal you are willing to fulfill
Literally sitting on my bed in the dark trying not to throw up
Also this guy in my contact as hairy jerry sent me a pic of him shirtless and said I miss you and I have no idea who he is /when or if I met him but that's not normal?!
We had sex on the bear rug. He said "you, me and the bear. This is bear-idise"
Went and sat in the wrong fucking class for 30 mins, answering questions and shit. What ever this is i will be on it for the rest of the semester.
I don't know whether to cheer for the free bourbon, or cry from the screaming children.
well that was a fail
maybe for you, but i got a free ice cube in my bra
Randomize
