i told him that if he starts being sappy its friends = off. he called me jerkface and drew on me w permanent marker. im either in love w him or we are twelve.
Can you send me a pic of you vag, I'm sexting the guy and he wants a pic but I didnt shave
dude are you serious?
I know you already have a pic on your phone
Guy at red light looking at porn. I'm waiting for him to look over at me so I can shake my head and he can feel bad
I went with the blow up doll and I'm glad I did.
My walk of shame got a new perspective when I walked into his livingroom and found his roommate fucking some chick on the coffee table.
Our dealer is pledging my frat. When he come to sell me weed I make him take out the garbage.
Honestly, It follows the same rules as Cock Roulette.
Something about getting whistled at in my work clothes while crossing the street with three Nuvarings in my back pocket feels wrong.
They want yo temporarily sterile ass.
He had bigger boobs than me last night and we both weren't wearing a bra so it was a fair judgement
I guess I just stopped wanting to rip his balls out and started being okay with him being alive. that's a typical feeling for exes right?
Yeah its great. Whenever we want a new bowl we hand it to Trevor and he clears it in one hit. Definitely one of the benefits to having a swimmer in your circle.
He was stoned and starts screaming, "I ain't got but a dollar, I wanna hear waterfalls!". Maybe he can hang with us....
I made out with a guy so that I could get ahead in the bathroom line, totally acceptable
She asked me if I would fuck her with my storm trooper mask on
I fucked a French man last night. 5 Times. Ashed my cig in his cactus. That later set on fire while we were having sex.
Randomize
