How come twittering sounds sexual?
Because of Bambi.
Oh shit. Easter I forgot. Maybe we should leave the illegal stuff for when Jesus is less present.
Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.
You were competing with my dog to see who had the stronger bark....
and my souvenir for the night was a nice ambulance blanket
...She was shooting whiskey using a turkey baster...i was horrified.
Just peed in a urinal with another girl. It's that kind of night.
Oh dude, thanks for giving me that liquor last night, except replace 'giving' with 'violently forcing'.
i refuse to be around anyone not wearing a sombrero...its cinco de mayo
Tomorrow, you will get a text, and it will bE spelled right, that's me yo, certify ya soon
I almost lit my balls on fire tonight.
Remember the thing I sent you? "Often complex problems are best solved by thinking like an animal." Hump away!
ANNA YOU PEED ON THE STREET. LIKE NOT EVEN SUBTLY. YA JUST SQUATTED IN THE MIDDLE OF THE HIGHWAY. And you flashed your tits to oncoming vehicles to try to get them to pick us up
Good for you, kid with a beer in hand as you walk to your 11 am class.
I thought this was a dry campus.
That means you have to bring your own beer from home.
I'll be back in a hour going with Jason to get his nipples tattooed back on again
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