Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
I fucked **** last night, don't tell mike
this is mike. we're done.
I swear to god I'm with a high end prostitute right now and shes the most interesting person I've ever met. She just took me in to share an evening.
And as an added bonus she seems to have gotten a blood stain out of my favorite t-shirt
I swear to god Optimus Prime and Megatron are fighting in my head right now.
It made me feel like I need a reality show of my life so I could go back and watch the episodes to figure out how I got from the trunk of the car to my neighbors tree house...
Last night I apparently send my boss a picutre of my boobs. On the bonus part I got a raise today. So I just want to thank your parents for naming you Jeff cuz if I was not so hammered last night I would have sent it to the right one.
Sorry if I put you in that 'glad we're hanging out but I'm gonna go fuck your cousin' kind of position
If she doesn't judge me for bringing my vibrator in the tanning bed, I know she is a true friend.
You guys don't happened to be dressed as gladiators, do you?
I think that's the first time Navy dress blues and a Ninja Turtles onesie have been involved in the same makeout.
Just woke up. Naked. Under an animal pelt. With a girl. I've never met her. She's pretty naked too.
Sometimes you have a glimmer of a heart and then I immediately remember you are dead inside.
I'm only friends with her because I can't stop watching the train wreck.
finals do horrible things to a person. i haven't worn pants since friday
she filled my toilet with birdseed... i tried flushing it but now it's clogged so she has to come over and fix it because it was her mistake in the first place
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