just checked my call log and realized that we talked for 3 mns. what did i say for that long?
pretty standard. you have fun last night?
apparently....what exactly does 'pretty standard' mean?
typical hot then cold, followed by a death threat.
Blew in her face. She is Pissed. Yahtzee. As she brushes her teeth.
i just googled the alphabet. i couldnt remember if it was jklomnop or jklmnop.
you kept running around the room with a flask shouting "so much room for activities!" then someone tripped you and you passed out
Are you seriously trying to guilt me into sending you naked pictures by saying "So I can look at them during dialysis" ?
Is it working?
In hindsight, the torn ligament in my knee is probably the fault of the ginbucket and jager bombs starting at 3pm. I guess I'll stop blaming it on you.
Aj and I already plan to tape our thumbs to our palms so we know how it feels to be a t-rex.
I just had a 30 minute conversation about hummingbirds. That high.
I miss high conversations.
Swinging. Is. Amazing.
As far as figuring life out your talking to a guy that's alternating text messages between his baby mama and a drunk bitch I met tailgating. My best advice is don't worry about shit out of your control and always and I really mean ALWAYS wear a condom.
I haven't found him passed out in the living room covered in noodles for a while now so I guess he's getting better with the drinking.
So last night I learned something new. Whenever I drink beer out of a bottle a random guy buys me another one. It was like as soon as the glass hit my lips every guy in a 20ft radius got a hard on.
Oh it's not a problem. Cleaning up the yard and disposing of 75 gallons of Jello is all I've got to look forward to today.
HIS NAME IN MY PHONE IS JOSHUA DREAMCHASER I CAN NOT
NO SHAME NOVEMBER
You could totally spank that new found Catholicism out of him.
we had sex while we waited for the thai food... a which will come first type of situation
Randomize
