Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
i wish you could fill a pinata with booze
dude i need to stop getting high. i cant afford to eat like this...
Ya but I plan to getting arrested more towards the end of summer
The last thing I remember was paying off her younger brother not to judge me, then puking on his shoes.
And before you knew it they were calling me the pussy usher or something like that
Somehow ended up home, probably had something to do with the makeshift ladder from my second story window. Now headed to church, still drunk, and still fighting back the vomit of a thousand different alcohols. Successful night.
I came in and I guess my parents didn't hear me. My dad just said "Don't be lazy, RIDE IT." to my mom. Never coming home again.
I AM VODKA MAN
He's saved in my phone as 'MURICA. I think it's safe to say I'm not exactly taking him seriously.
Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat dat dat dat dat ~uterus contraction~
I may or may not be setting up an encounter with a foot fetishist just because I'm curious.
I probably would do him if given the chance but how awkward would Bible study be after that.
You think that was bad? One time my parents found my sister half naked on top of the four runner in the garage. She makes me look like the good child.
There are only a few things more freaky than wandering around a zoo drunk.
Randomize
