Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
no, no I am DEF NOT pregnant. typo. sorry, wanted to talk about us...
You tried to poop in the sink last night.
Sorry for eating those cheese fries out of your hands last night
Ok if you are accepting my apology, please continue to ignore me. If you are not, please fill out the brief survey that follows, to help me improve my people relations: a) your a bitch please leave me alone b)your crazy pls leave me alone c) I never cared ab u please leave me alone. D) all of the above e) all of the above but I wouldn't mind still fucking u. F) who are you again? Your answer will not b shared and will b used in accord. With the law. TY
It's like I'm snorkeling in an ocean of tequila.
Is it sad that i just saw my moms thumb on the table & i instinctively put mine down cuz i thought she was thumbmaster?
We pretended the crowd cheering the Thunder's win was cheering for us while we had sex on the couch.
oh god my hair smells like rotten vegetables, sweat, and tequila. I wanna party with your neighbors every night.
The sad thing was my husband told her its ok to make out with me. Bar Tuesdays will live on regardless.
somehow this went from sexting to explaining my eating disorder.
I wore his All-American medal during sex. I came in first that night.
I can't believe I got dumped for a fat chick, but at least I got four and a half years worth of free shit. So we can call it even.
Sorry this is taking so long. I'm looking for my dignity.
If you survived your 72 hour masturbation marathon put on some pants and come over. My mom dropped off a lasagna.
Randomize
