Well that's not true. She had two social skills. She kept them in her bra
those are such fre$h shoes
going to ignore the use of the word "fresh" in a sentence that isnt related to produce and/or other food stuffs and especially the part where you replaced an "s" with a dollar sign
you know that dress I got margarita and puke on? yeah, just returned it.
We had sex in the bathroom. Then he told me I could watch him pee.
There is literally a guy in my class with a gallon of water and a trophy.
I'm going to die alone in a sea of empty vodka bottles and cats.
do you find it slutty that the last person I had sex with is also the person who sings my ringtone ?
He kept calling my vagina a magic clam, and it was speaking to him, telling him to feed it his penis. I played along.
It is a special kind of bonus when you find money you hid from yourself when you were drunk in the tampon box. What did we do last period?
he was extremely fucked up- he thought my sports bra was his boxers. even when his leg wouldnt fit. at least whiskey dick wasnt a problem
I let him fuck me in a batman costume. Don't talk to me about needing to read fifty shades gray.
Trying to Jedi mind trick myself into not throwing up. This is not the esophagus you are looking for.
a guy just walked through our campsite, crouched down by the truck, screamed "ACID ONLY LASTS FOR 8 HOURS RIGHT?!", then ran off into the bushes
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
She asked me if I would fuck her with my storm trooper mask on
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