I'm so bummed I missed coconut bowling. It's fucking cold here and no coconuts to be found
I'll write directions out on a napkin and slip it to him. Then say P.S. The UTI is gone.... that's not creepy at all right?
Now I'll never know if Megan finds a millionaire.
It's like, I'm the official vagina for that DJ group
HAPPY NEWYEARSM FAGTRON! GETTING HEAD IN TAXI I WIN
Her mom caught her drunk streaking when she was 12. Of course she's perfect for me.
There's nothing like sitting directly behind someone you fucked 5 years ago at church on Easter Sunday
Can we put your name for the shipping address for penis ice luge?
We were all definitely blackout with drunk goggles on, even though you and Amanda were the only ones dressed up as it.
Just start grabbing cocks. It can't go wrong! Just say you thought you knew him and wanted to check.
I may be in the process of acquiring a second male fuck buddy and dating a girl....FUCKING STOP THE TRAIN I'M ON! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!!
What if everything solid was made of oreos and everything liquid was wine
I just got chills
I'm disease and pregnancy free. This is an Easter for the books!
I just bought a slurpee and condoms. God bless America.
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
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