I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
Just walked in and was handcuffed to a police woman. Fire fighter woman poured franzia down my throat. Aaaaand I just ate cookies off of Little Red Riding Hood's tits.
Just woke up with a blunt in each nostril and a lighter duct taped to my chest...good lookin out
well apperantly i passed out on the stairs shouting "victory".
He just gave himself a boner while driving using "the power of his mind"
The only thing that was weird was that it WASN'T weird when she got out of the shower and saw me blowing him.
So we have also come to the conclusion that slam piece Saturday's are the appropriate follow ups to find a husband Fridays
Also my vagina isn't a crater of death where nothing comes out
I just imagined you going baby-crazy and trying to shove him up into your uterus. Yes, I'm aware he's 7 years old.
When i like your selfie it means one of two things. 1. thats a nice photo, friend. OR 2. I wanna bend you over a table. But youll never know.
Summers almost over and we haven't golfed, got naked or had sex yet. Let's do all three in one day, no particular order.
I refuse to plan drunken casual sex. Just think of the monster I'd create.
She woke up next me in bed and told me to stop driving so fast.
And our sex soundtracks thus far have been metal and Star Wars
I’m really regretting these suede pants.
Randomize
