Tell her she's as useless as a condom.
does the new i-phone have a pregnancy test app?
God I'm so bored. I wish I had a baby or something to play with.
And this is exactly why you should NEVER have kids.
Why does everyone think all I do is drink? I go to class on wednesdays
I just saw a kid walk into class with his dad. Fuck his life.
fyi, take the long route to the library. the "can i be your baby daddy?" homeless man migrated back for winter
I'm going to make him fall in love with me one blow job at a time.
She just left after she spent the past 2.5 hours fuckin the shit out of me. I'll put that in the logbook as a cross country
I think I'm going to make a pina klonopin before class.
By this time tomorrow I expect us to be sitting at the kitchen table either playing a drinking game, or crying. Set an alarm
The last thing I want is a chocolate mold of my cock competing with my real cock for time spent in your mouth
She was bending and I said "finally, about time". Wrong, she was tying her shoe. No blowjobs for me.
There are more dirty dishes in my bed then in the kitchen. Have I lost at life?
I slept with six men with different nationalities this week. Who says I'm not a woman of culture?
omg last night while walking home from your house I stole a seatless bike and carried it into my next door neighbors kitchen.. we just looked It up online it's an antique and worth $500 dollars
Randomize
