I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
Down at cameli's and some homeless dude just pulled out a taser. Awesome.
There's a certain level of slut that i can handle.... I think she just broke that scale
u girls! girls! girls! have fun please don't hook up w/ a roadie! Love, mom
I feel like my teeth are caked on with other teeth. What did I just smoke?
You rode him down the last flight of stairs like a human sled.
On that note I give you a 10 for sticking the landing and staying on the whole ride.
I actually cannot wait for your visit. I miss people who make me look like the virgin mary in comparison.
I'm beginning to worry that I seem to get along best with people when I'm naked with them.
He is really real. Like I know where he works, have referenced him with mutual fb friends and I've seen his dick. He's real.
Just blew a guy who had the same phone case as me. It was destiny.
He may not be fully over his current wife yet. But wait until I show him my tits in his office at the end of the day tonight.
The guy I screamed at across the bar for booing the Bruins ended up buying me shots I had to explain to him there's not a chance in hell I would ever fuck a Canadian! #Bostonstrong
He said it wasn't ladylike of me to drink more whiskey than him. I told him to stop being a little bitch.
My breath smells like gin and sadness
That Spanish guy who looks like Ben Affleck from that club we went to 3 weeks ago is still texting me.. He clearly doesn't remember what I look like.
Randomize
