So she stayed over last night and slept walked in to my moms room where she used the bathroom and then proceeded to get in bed with my moms naked boyfriend. So yeah, at least now my family got to meet her.
I take back everything bad I said about that song party in the usa. There's just something about seeing a cross dresser lipsing it that makes a song sooo much better.
he was shitfaced drunk and couldn't walk but could still recite the top 10 in order from the first season of american idol. impressive
it was like watching bambi learning to walk, if bambi was 22 and a high functioning alcoholic.
Did you seriously take investment advice from our coke dealer?
His dick is longer than my foot and I'm a size 9. I'm literally kicking myself in the vagina
She just texted me that she's horny, then started quoted random music, then telling me everything she regrets. I don't think there's enough tequila in the world for me to deal with her...
While eating post sex burritos I dripped taco bell sauce on my boob. He licked it off and asked why I hadn't thought of that before.
All I want is a guy who will love me and occasionally shave my balls.
Just got into a fight with a trashcan, today is obviously not going to be my day.
Does it qualify as sexting if you're both pretending to be fictional characters?
I'm not sure whether to be proud of you or weirded out.
I got custody of our girlfriend in the breakup.
yo dude not sure how this happened but im drunk at your house eating burritos with your mom and sister. hope you're having fun in new zealand
I don't want a big night. But I am okay if we wake up in a penthouse at Crown Casino.
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
Randomize
