'hiiiigh' is saved in my t9 for a reason
i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
All I want to do right now is burp, puke, and fart. In that order.
Can you tell me why I have pubes stuck in my teeth?
i'm considering texting him with "i'm leaving the country for a year, wanna fuck?"
do it. it's every man's dream.
This is so fucking sad. Netherlands isn't even a real country.
she made out with a stripper. how was scrabble night with your girlfriend
I just took a shower and I feel like 20 pounds of sex just came off of me.
NO. NO LET HIS PENIS TOUCH YOU.
I had to have my mom pick me up from the party and the windows lock was on so when I went to projectile vomit out the window it wouldn't roll down and it splashed back at my face.
Life gets in the way of sexy Saturday sometimes
I've shit my pants 4 times in 12 hours... Never trust a fart when u pass 30
Did you send me a snapchat of your sister triple kissing two other girls?!!! You might be the greatest friend the world ever made
but seriously, if you see a redhead running down the street tonight in a carrot costume, call 911. He's tripping hard.
so i went over to her house and we played crash bandicoot, ate calzones, and had sex all day. im in love.
Randomize
