C thinks vomiting on the batroom floor = reaon not to party. Lies. Party continues.
You should never have let annie watch you have sex with other women
her parents were awake and in the next room. i think i deserve a big fucking medal for that orgasm.
My mom just called and reminded me not to throw up in any cabs tonight. Happy St. Patty's Day.
I was hoping we just happened to wake up naked and I hadn't fucked him.... no such luck.
Right now im sitting at home and all i can think about is im eating calories and i should be out drinking them.
He set 8 alarms to make sure I took my birth control on time..
No our divorce decree will not have a blow job clause. Unless my alimony is greatly increased your bj's have been reduced to fantasy status.....
I am walking funny today. And it's sad because it's from the bad encounter with the sidewalk rather than a good encounter with a stripper
You want to groom your chest hair? You mean with a little baby chest hair brush? Because that sounds adorable.
I tried to have a quickie with him at the company happy hour. I think I need to quit my job.
Ive already seen two fights and a clown urinating in the middle of the street. Hello Halloween 2014.
How fast can you get here?\nI need to ride your cock into the sunset.
I just found one of your beard hairs in my oatmeal.
Walking into my bedroom & smelling stale sex & disappointment isn't how I envisioned being 39, in case you were wondering.
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